Fighting The “It’s Not Fair” Syndrome

Back when I started blogging about 1-1/2 years ago, I wrote a post called Up & Down and Up & Down.  Basically it’s a synopsis of one of my “roller-coasters of life,” when again I found myself sitting back and saying:  I just don’t get it – why, why, and why… 

In that post, it was about our son Jeffrey, and another setback we experienced when stuff just didn’t make sense to me – until, of course, my mind got back into focus as to just how we are supposed to be living on this earth as Christians.

So let me ask you – do you struggle with falling into pity-party mode?  Why does God allow things to happen sometimes – it just doesn’t make sense!

swimmingI have to admit there are times when my heart still gets pierced to the core as I hear about friends’ beautiful sons and daughters going on mission trips with their church friends, getting married, and starting their own families.  Or taking great hiking or beach trips with their kids.

I find myself wondering if Jeffrey will ever be able to experience such things.

But when I start feeling the downer-mode coming on me, I also have to remind myself of sweet friends I have known over the years whose strong and healthy sons and daughters have not gone on to lead the beautiful life you dream for your children, and instead have gotten involved in drugs, alcohol and even imprisonment.

I have to keep reminding myself:  It’s not all about you, Linda…

Remember:  The Bible doesn’t ever promise that our lives will be like a beautiful rose on this earth – that comes later in heaven!

Think about the bleeding woman in Luke 8:43-48.  She had been bleeding for 12 years and no one had been able to help her.  How desperate she must’ve felt at times as she was probably shunned by society.  How often must she have said to herself, Why is this happening to me – what have I done to deserve this?

Did she think about having a family and just being normal?  Would her dreams of being healed ever be fulfilled?  But she didn’t give up – she went fighting her way through a throng of people just to touch Jesus’ robe.  And she was healed.

Let’s switch gears and think about another woman in the Bible – the woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11).  It’s so easy to think of her as an unsavory woman who was living a lifestyle of sin.  But what if she was actually deeply in love with the man she was sleeping with?  No, I’m not condoning her actions, but I remember myself years ago.  Was she being pressured to sleep with this man she thought loved her?

Think of it:  The plan must’ve been laid well in advance for it to have been pulled off as it had.  Were some of the Pharisees watching through the window as the woman and her lover were in bed?  Yuk, the shame she must have felt when they came barging in…

run the raceWe are not told exactly how it all came into play, but we do know that Jesus had mercy on her and did not condemn her.

God’s ways are certainly not our own.  Yet where are our thoughts supposed to be?  What are we to be focusing on?

Ah… someday this life will all make sense.  But until that time we must remember that as Christians this earth is not our home!  So until the time comes that we leave this earth to go and be with the Lord, there are going to be trials; and through those trials we must try and remain as joyful as we possibly can (yikes – that’s hard sometimes).  We need to know that our God is with us, and that He is fine-tuning us into just what He wants us to be (James 1:2-4).

My husband Gary had a wonderful mentor who stood by him when we lost our children, and I remember one time he told Gary that once he gets to heaven he’s going to ask God “why” He allowed Gary and I to go through the issues we have.

But you know what?  When we get there, I’m not going to care!





Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s